Thursday, January 5, 2012

A long time coming...

I am not sure why it is so hard to commit to writing on this darn blog. I guess the fact that i have never done it, coupled with the idea that I am not really interesting enough to read about tends to hold me back... I have noticed that I am feeling frustrated and more irritated than normal... I feel like i need a release and maybe some sort of connection to people who are like me.... people with a band or who are trying to be healthy.

I am currently doing very well with my weight loss. I am at 196 lbs and am down from a RECORDED high of 312. ( I am quite sure that I was heavier than that at some point.) I finished my first triathlon and have many many plans for active living for next year.... Although I know that I have accomplished alot so far, I have some really negative feelings that I cannot see
I am finally under 200 lbs after a little over 2 years with the band... Whoever said that you don't lose weight in your second year was W.R.O.N.G! I lost like 40lbs.... not so sad, Sam! I am really proud of that.... My mom and I were talking the other day and she was laughing at me because she remembers that I told her I would be happy if I could just get under 200.... the mysterious and scary and evasive "onederland!!!" I thought that I would be SO happy if I could just get there.... That doesn't seem to be the case AT all!!! Don't get me wrong.... I am thrilled to tiny little pieces that I have joined the likes of so many of my banded idols.... but I still hunger for more...I want to lose AT LEAST another 30lbs, if not more.

Although I know that I have accomplished alot so far, I have some really negative feelings that I cannot seem to shake...

What really butters my biscuit is that so many people seemed shocked over that.... "Why would you want to lose that much?!?!" "You'll be too skinny...." Grrrrrrr..... No I wont... I would be in a healthy weight range for my height, you asshat. I know that people mean well but it is frustrating to feel like I am the only one in my life here that doesn't think it is OK to remain in the "overweight" category.... For once I want to go to the doctor and be considered "normal" ( not that much about me is such... lol)

On a happy note, I am less than 10 lbs from being considered just "overweight" on the BMI charts!!! It is shocking to realize that my BMI is 31 now but WAS 48.... HOLY CRAP... That is FANTASTIC.......

I guess I need to realize that even though I may not see the differences, there is MUCH less of me today then there was on November 17th, 2009.

I will leave you with a few photos...

My Triathlon Ladies! Tri It For Life is a women's only group and
they made it possible for me to finish....

When I got into the pool for the first time, I panicked and swallowed 10 gallons of water!

My SUPER supportive husband ran across the finish line with me....screaming the whole way!

Close it out with a picture of my pretty momma and me!

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